| get yo lighters roll that sticky lets get high |
[01 Mar 2006|11:02pm] |
stab rip stab stab lol
(pictures - coming soon!)
Whatever happens - Happens,
And in the end if I'm still alive,
Then that's all that matters.
stop worrying about love/hate, just be happy.
I miss all the conversations I used to have with Adam Smith.
DazednCnfused546: in the end you just need *a best friend, a place to be, and a joint.*
Grr...Ana's homesick for Santee.
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| if you can hear a piano fall you can hear me coming down the hall |
[18 Feb 2006|12:39am] |
we met tad at the train station in solana beach.
we were all high and ran around and freestyled in the elevator like cracked out tree hugging thugs.
uh we picked up the bitch and went to the beach to smoke then to mira mesa. which was sworming with cops. uh dank buddah which we got a large amount of. jake kept buying hot cheetos which made my night. it was his birthday. we went back to the slut spot and had a pow wow on jason's blanket with pieces and fatty joints. sammi kiki and michelle showed up but they were cold & went to sleep in sammi's car. i kept going back and forth cos i can't sit still sometimes and bothering people is what i do best. i went home at like 1 and passed the fuck out. lol
the next morning was amazing. sammi kelly kiki jon and i met up and hot boxed the car with a strawberry(?) blunt. went to the beach and we sat on a cliff. i tried taking a picture of everyone and i almost fell off. lol
 </a>
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| sunrise, sunset |
[18 Feb 2006|12:31am] |
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music |
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hollywood undead- knife called lust |
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tonight = orgasmic.
getting crunk in cars while its raining is something i want to do for the rest of my life with all of my friends.
oooo how i do LOVE people who can pull off jacking a DUFFLE BAG FULL OF LIQUOR.
i've been so sick lately.
i put a lot of new pictures up
&&& stuff. on my myspace
love it till it hurts. <3
i got a cellphone
my numbers
8588695592.
call me !!!
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| if we go down we go down together |
[07 Feb 2006|06:15pm] |
on the floor in sami's car.
kelly and i at tad's hotel party
 the bitches know how to get down. <3
the morning after was harsh.
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[20 Dec 2005|02:05pm] |
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this place is hell. i've been here for a year. i used to be close with everyone and it felt like a family but they forgot about me and it's not the same. i kind of feel like the person who's not wanted. whatever. if things don't get better i might as well leave. there's no reason for me to be here anymore and have my dad drag me down if theres no one to pick me back up. so much for bestfriends. </3
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| I want sugar in my tea. |
[16 Dec 2005|12:57am] |
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mood |
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 restless |
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music |
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weezer |
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i had a good week. i'm not worrying myself with drama. jason patrick and steven went to pb and ate pasta at a little cafe. she makes her own lemonade. i had a really big donut and smoked hookah late at night in the cold in the dirt. i've been seeing people outside of the club lately which is what i wanted. variety.
stole alcohol. drank a lot. after like half way threw the night i black out. i went to north coast for my first time on wed. i felt like i was sitting in a library. it's easier. i'm content. jason introduced me to a lot of nice people in the little shopping center by torrey hills. i need to be more social and less quiet. i can't believe joe's never had pat & oscar breadstick's before.he made a noose and i tried hanging myself. i did a lot of things. i like livejournal because it helps me remember. i love looking back on life. a lot of people are leaving for winter break. o well the real fun is right here. i'm going to miss everyone a lot. night before last i got tied to a chair but i got out myself. then i got into a BITCH fight and woke up with bruises. all i have to say is smoke a bowl for every new hole. then i got kicked out of my house for coming home at 1 and being an angry drunk lol but it's fine. i'm back.
i'm content with being sober, sitting, and watching movies or playing video games with friends. there's nothing wrong with that. i love conversations. like silence is my worst enemy. i talk out of my ass so much and no one cares. like i'm foolish and confused when i'm drunk. it's fine. my friends love me, and i love them.
i don't like people thinking they can be all over me. i know im fucked up a lot but i just want to have fun and be friends with everyone. NOTHING ELSE. if i wanted you, i'd tell you that. um i cant think anymore. i hope this entry makes sense. it's so out of order but whatever. it'll make sense to me lol.
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| hey lush, have fun it's the weekend. |
[10 Dec 2005|05:17pm] |
friday night was memorable. i got over being sick.
i love monique, ar, and claire.
shannelle was goneee.. lol i took pictures so she could remember last night. but a lot of people didn't appreciate that. my chest and throat still hurts from last week. the cough syrup stopped working. gotta love reformed good people!
note: as long as you are in monique's car,
YOU ARE invisable TO EVERYTHING in the world except asians. lol
blah...
i wanted to go to the beach today.
but i ended up at tyler's house with ar smokin.
i want some type of adventure tonight,
but i'll most likely end up in the same place, doing the same things, with the same people. but i love them so it doesn't matter. charish 24 hour partying while it lasts. i need to get a job and make a meeting with north coast so i can get my school shit done. i'm procrastinating on life or maybe it just feels like that. OKAY YOU GUYS, NO MORE CIGARETTES FOR ANA. lol
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| You tried to set them free, but they've thrown away the keys. |
[06 Dec 2005|02:55pm] |
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this morning i was so out of it. i'm really proud that i can still get high and be productive. fuck sleeping all the time. i need to change my ways. i just went to the meeting for school. i'm going to north coast once a week, and getting a job until i take the highschool proficency test in february or whenever it is. i was so nervous. i thought the meeting would have gone bad but it didn't. i'm so amped.
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| the clock is down and i am losing one day at a time. |
[06 Dec 2005|12:54am] |
the things i ruin for myself are a benefit to others. i fuck up, i loose good friends mainly because i keep important things to myself and because i can't control my whore ass. i have the worst timing. i hate myself. but whatever atleast now everythings out on the table. im sorry. so you can ignore me forever if you want, i deserve it. i just don't want to face what i did. so i'm not going to 3rd for the rest of my life.
BUT on a lighter note: tonight was random but perfect. i'm not going to jump into anything even though i already did... whatever happens happens, if we let it. it just might work out. this time i'll be a little confident but i'm not getting my hopes up. i have a feeling this is going to end up just like before.
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| And I don't dream since I quit sleeping And I haven't slept since I met you. |
[05 Dec 2005|04:06am] |
 | | The Sudden Departure
Random Brutal Love Master (RBLMf)
Sweet. Dear. Loving. At Gate 18. Final call.
You are The Sudden Departure.
You've been in a lot of serious relationships. More than a few have ended ugly. Uglily. Whatever. Our guess is that you're a really fantastic girl who doesn't really know what she wants, and you've broken a few hearts as a result. You fall for people easily, and you enjoy the feeling of falling in love, but once you're there, either boredom or the old "grass is greener" syndrome sets in. The mind wanders, and with it goes the flesh. And then the toiletries.
Your exact opposite:
The Intern
Deliberate Gentle Sex Dreamer
| We know you're not the classic "love 'em and leave 'em" type, at least not in a purely sexual sense. You have too many serious bonding tendencies for that. But even though you're theoretically looking to settle down, you don't settle long on one person. "Serial monogamist" is probably something you hear a lot. "Emotionally loose" is another way to put it. To the poor girls eating your dust and sniffing your panties, it doesn't really make much difference. Of course, it's not really your fault that people get hurt. You have every right to move on when you choose.
ALWAYS AVOID: The Intern, The Maid of Honor
CONSIDER: The Sudden Departure, someone just like you
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Link: The 32-Type Dating Test by OkCupid - Free Online Dating.
My profile name: blindfold_cupid |
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| sleeping all day, staying up all night. |
[05 Dec 2005|12:35am] |
completely sober. smoking gritz.
kiki and monique.
i'm happy i don't drive.
monique's car.
i hang out with the beautiful people.
ar.
tyler.
THIS WEEKEND WAS INCREDIBLY EVENTFUL.
friday i got a haircut at supercuts in solana beach. i don't know why i went all the way over there but its chill. my hair is SO SOFT. i love it. Tequilla and bud pretty much owns our souls. oh I hung out at the beach and the future park... there were so many creepers out. smoked in the el pollo loco drive threw. lol wow then i went to jasons house and drank more. swam in the rain. then i had to wake up for saturday school. I FELT SO DEAD. Monique kept me company then i hung out with her afterwards. HER DOG is hyper. um then i dont remember.... um saturday night i stayed at b's. we watched boondock saints and everytime they said fuck we pugged whiskey. I love my friends. I feel so at home around everyone. God Tomorrow morning is going to suck like being kicked in the shins.
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[14 Nov 2005|09:39pm] |
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so i heard rudy isn't coming back. he got drug tested by his mom. my bathing suits still in his dad's apartment along with my heart. i'm gonna miss him. i miss everything about this week. just being free and in good company. not having to worry about the real life. ever since i've been home my dad still won't support me and i rather not be here. im starting to accept that my brother isn't going to get well. it's dissapointing but i know no matter what he loves me. he means the world to me. he always hugs me when i leave, and kisses me goodnight. it makes me sad knowing his future is empty. but he's the only reason i'll stay. i'll try to hold everything together. I just really need a job, and a car, and a group of good friends. we'll move far away, start over somewhere new. i can't wait until then.
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| adventures of scuba steve |
[13 Nov 2005|11:34am] |
i started staying at b's house when things got rough with my dad and brother. we fought constantly about stupid things. it kind of grew in time and i didnt want to go back. B's apt. became my second home. i would set the alarm clock for 7am and do my homework on the couch. listen to music videos, smoke hookah, and other things. He had a nightstand with a drilled hole in the top of the table for inserting your cigarette butts. But then my brother and dad found it when i wasnt in school one day so; Rudy took me in. He lived in solana beach in an empty apartment with a beautiful view of the ocean and fairgrounds. we would always sit on the roof and smoke cigarettes and think about the future. I loved being there. Mark and Marvyn would always stop by and say hi & smoke & play music. We stayed up one night and cleaned out his car. He had a green pacifire. It was the cutest moment of my life. Just sitting there talking about his past. Everyone did a lot of YAYO for a while. it was fun watching everyones moods change depending on the drug. We would always sleep in late and sit around the house all day. Then riley dropped me off at school one day and before i knew it he went back to texas. My bags got dropped off at b's and I no longer had a bestfriend. Thankfully I hung out with John that day at lunch who told me that if i needed a place to stay I could stay with him. So i did. He's so sweet when he's sleeping. We partied a lot. Coorcidin and Vodka. We always had a morning miss. to find marijuana with monica and ralph and trevor and dan. All the funs over now. I have to focus on school again and come home at night. And stay out of trouble. I love everyone who was there for me even when i pull stupid shit like this. There was no reason for me to leave and do all the things i did. But i think in every story there is a lesson to be learned. And my lesson was to get a fucking job. lol Im such a broke ass bitch. It sucks living and not being able to get by. Relying on other people makes me feel low. So yah.. it was a long week.
PS I MADE EVERYTHING UP.
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[16 Jul 2005|02:55am] |
i've been keeping quiet lately
i did good in summer school
i haven't been sober in months
i twitch a lot when im waiting
i love kiki and hannah
tonight i went to che cafe
for the record, all underground rap rules
i wrote my name on a couch
on the freeway we sang abstract rude
we partied at benitos
then went to chill at phils
i'm scared to go to the bathroom now
when i came out i had to attempt clearing a 5 foot bong
i was conent for hours
a lot was said and done
we ordered a lot of jack in the box
i've been roaming around on lj for two hours
tomorrow i get to spend all day with my baby
sunday means fucking SWAP MEET
which means new shoes and clothes
i need a bigger purse.
<3<3
i will most likely be sleeping in 5 minutes
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[19 Jun 2005|11:39pm] |
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdgnieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at Cmabrigde
Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh?
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| If you are the answer then we are going straight to hell |
[16 Jun 2005|08:41am] |
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i said i loved you. you said you loved me. i walked into love you stayed outside of it.
i feel like shit.
lizzy doesn't deserve this, no one does.
i love old people, they shouldn't pass away.
i hate the world.
let's go start a new one.
we can be in control.
And there would be nothing but peace and happiness.
And only the best of people would live forever.
we will never be lonely.
i'm so fucking sorry.
i hate how in the end i know i have to get over it. but i don't want to. i want to complain and carry on because he was the GREATEST. It'll never really fade, there will always be a faint memory of how much he ment to me. and yah... there's no way of explaining myself completely. i just feel like shit. she told me on aim. i haven't seen her in ages and we used to be the closest of friends. like the time katie's dog died in her backyard the night she spent the night at my house. i feel like my existence and mess ups bring bad luck for others.
( you are the bluest light )
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blindfold_cupid's journal
chipper
